eltoNNNNNN and the Curse of Number 1 on the Perth PR
A long time ago in a distant, far off land known as Perthe, the good king "eltoNNNN" (history books are not clear on exactly how many Ns were in his name, some say it could have been 4444) ruled. He was a kind and loving king who sought no more than to protect his people from East Coast Bias. When discussions riled up over who was the greatest king of each land many people would ignore Perthe, but with eltoNNNN's kindness and strong bair zoning, he was hard to ignore.

As thanks to him from those that he protected, once a month the King would visit his people in a cafe and receive donations. The many good people of Perthe would never question their donations, as they knew just how much it meant to not be mocked by the East.

However, all would not be well in the future.

After 14 months of donations the King was demanding more and more each time from his people but they had had enough. No longer was he the good king, eltoNNNN, he was far too greedy for that title. Word of the civil unrest reached the ears of three brave musketeers; Sir Jollus, Duke Exor and the noble Kevin. Together, they defeated the King and demanded he leave the land under their control. eltoNNNN was not happy with this at all and laid down down a curse on the land of Perthe

"thou shalt not hath a player rule this land for more than one PR season!"

The three musketeers were understandably confused over this statement. What's a PR season? Why only one? They shrugged and went their separate ways. Some say Duke Exor became a holy man, to better study the 5 Gods, others that Kevin moved to Japan to become a Samurai warrior. Sir Jollus stayed to protect the land as best he could, his power diminished without that of his friends.


The Three Musketeers; pictured together for the last time. From left to right the Noble Kevin, Sir Jollus and Duke Exor

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Do you believe in the curse? Some say it is still in effect, others that this is a nonsense shitpost written by silly…



OH GOD THE CURSE IS REAL

by Maribro 07/11/2016 00:00:00

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